Dear NBC, Stop Ruining the Olympics

We’re two days into the Olympics, and so far I have experienced more frustration than enjoyment. This frustration has nothing to do with Michael Phelps missing the podium in the 400-meter individual medley, Jordyn Wieber failing to qualify for the all-around finals in gymnastics, or the men’s swimming 4×100-meter freestyle relay team settling for silver, though. Nope. This frustration comes from not being able to watch any of those events live.

See, NBC isn’t showing any of the major events (swimming, gymnastics, track, etc.) in real time. They’re showing them on tape delay in primetime, because that way they make more money. If you want to watch those events live, you have to watch them online on NBC’s Live Extra. It sounds like an OK enough idea in theory, but the problem is that the online feed has been awful. It’s choppy, it cuts in and out, and it sometimes freezes for minutes on end. And I have Verizon Fios, so it’s not like I’m stuck in the days of dial-up or anything.

15 Thoughts Heading Into The Olympics

-This will be the first Olympics without baseball since 1988 and the first without softball since 1992. I still don’t understand why either sport was eliminated. Because Europe doesn’t care about them? Boo freaking hoo. The rest of the world doesn’t care about team handball, but that gets to stay. Enough countries play baseball to make it worth keeping, and the Olympics were softball’s biggest stage. Anti-American bias, I say.

-But no worries, everyone — they’re bringing back women’s team epee fencing, which was left out of the 2008 Games. I’m sure you’re all as thrilled about this as I am.

-While we’re on stupid sports, have you ever actually looked at the complete list of Olympic events? It’s absurd. I get as pumped for the Olympics as anyone, but there are a ton of events I just cannot imagine ever watching. For instance, there are five canoeing events, 11 kayaking events, 14 rowing events and 10 sailing events. Look, I’m all for a day out on the water, but do we really need all 40 of these events? Also, there’s no women’s canoeing for some reason. Are women not capable of handling a canoe?